Anyway today went kbox-ing With s13s today Was pretty fun I guess (: Didn't expect it to be haha Thought too many people would be a crowd But ended up quite high And funny Although it was further proof Of my non-existent singing ability LOL I feel like a pig Ate MOS burger Kakiage burger, 5 pc butterfly prawn, corn soup + Famous Amos cookies Then dinner was fried fish soup with rice at Koufu And the time gap between the two meals was like 3 or 4 hrs? Oh I'm such a massive glutton! At least I enjoyed myself okay The class was nice too To celebrate nov and dec babies With a coffee tasting chocolate cake (: Yay, with ONE candle, haha I turned one today! And also gave jiamin a farewell present -hugs- We'll miss you! It turned out better than I expected too Although she did tear But don't worry We'll still see each other next year
All in all it was all fun and games Fine and dandy But my mood swings when I am without company I think more when I'm alone I was meant to live a solitary life
♥words from deep within
♥
Hm I have the same number of posts As the number of messages in my SMS inbox
Taking the usual route home today And feeling rather emo Night time see? -thinks of xt XD- But anyway I was just thinking Am I a very horrible girl? I think I'd be disappointed if I knew Someone like myself Sigh I'm stupid and extremely tactless And maybe I should keep more to myself Everytime I try to open up I tend to blurt out all the wrong things Which may inadvertantly hurt some people I don't mean any offense seriously And I treasure every single one of my friends But it hurts when I'm being misunderstood All the right intentions All the wrong actions Maybe I should just be some recluse Treat people like strangers Stop blabbering about my life And other people's So if anyone thinks I'm being overly excited Stop me and ask me to shut up Because I need to stay away Or not I'll end up being a jinx And hurting someone unconsciously Sigh Heaven is punishing me By making me extremely accident prone I think I hit my head about 4 or 5 times this week Thrice by objects Around twice by people like TVT =P -moans- I feel stupider But like I wasn't already... Don't you think I should just stop barging into people's lives And leave them alone? I'm such a bad friend... I never meant for anything to happen in the wrong way Don't cheer me up It'll make me feel even more guilty I don't deserve your friendship Your kindness or concern I'm just this whiny selfish girl Who needs to be taught a lesson
LEAVE ME ALONE
♥words from deep within
♥ Monday, October 29, 2007
OP tmr And I'm freaking out Hoo boy... Hahaha I think I've practiced a whole lot Three or four times today alone Not including the three times at home And the two dry runs we had And quite a number of practices SO you would think I'm more confident AND super well prepared right? WRONG... Soooo wrong I'm horrified Terrified Unbelievably-fied Hahaha Gosh, I hate public speaking I feel so embarrassed for myself and I hope I don't make excessive gestures ACK I'll just hope for the best! Jiayou everyone =S
♥words from deep within
♥ Friday, October 26, 2007
Life wasn't meant to be painful Life was meant to be a gift from God A sign of hope That we could spread His love to all around us And live to glorify his name To make him proud of us But because of everything practical that is surrouding us Everything disastrous that mankind has created No matter big or small Everyone tends to forget He exists These creations break bonds Causes misery And puts in obstacles in everyone's lives But He will pull us through There is a reason for everything His love for us will help to guide us and comfort us When the going gets tough
So please help to bless my friends Help me to be a pillar of support for them And lift their spirits to fight on Whether they believe in you or not Grant them peace of mind And calmness of soul Please...
PW ruins our lives TOTALLY I'm really upset right now.
♥words from deep within
♥ Thursday, October 25, 2007
Sick of living as well But no one can tell Because I'm so insignificant Nobody notices me... -hides in the background- Just leave me be I'm being an annoyance in everyone's lives ): I suck I should just go kill myself for breathing in the air For which someone more deserving could have
Now who's that ugly person over there It's me being idiotic Like I always am I'm a weirdoooo )):
♥words from deep within
♥
Short short one again I'm tired Haha And dunno, just fed up with some things That are going on in my life But I'll put up with it Like I always have No one has ever seen me Without a smile on my face To brighten their days if they're down ;) Haha Hopefully that is
Gah MY TONE! Come back to meeeee H3 bio Please lemmeeee get it Haha My foremost goals!
And I have a craving for mos burger ebi tempura And something else Oh bittersweet chocolate And melon haagen daz ice cream I MUST save up to go On a huge eating spree
♥words from deep within
♥ Sunday, October 21, 2007
Busying myself again this weekend! Like Friday was rushing WR early in the morning Then afternoon was snoozing throughout XD And also attempting to start on OP
Saturday was woah I was out from 7am to 11pm Band in the morning Band soccer match with SC in the afternoon Went to sort of support and catch some sleep Then Saints Alumni Band prac in the evening Went for a rushed and messy dinner, lol Before going for what I term The most embarrassing practice ever Everyone was uber pro! And they played like really difficult songs! Between Grade 4 to 5 Like o_o I'm like a miserable grade 1 or something And my tone -wails- It became ultra sucky within a month or two!!! Like it was super thin but still kinda acceptable before The higher notes la But now Everything above high concert Bb Sounds like omg SCREECHING!!! and super SHAKY!!! -covers eyes- This is horribly demoralizing Anyway I like Goddess of Fire And Warcrye is absolutely impossible to play Sigh, I'll just have to get past my embarrassment Or just not go at all Aiiiii
Sunday OP practice and swimming Arm hurt from ytd's band Held the clarinet in that stuck position For like so many hours my shoulder aches Then intensive swimming lesson Rawrrr At least my OP's like done Except for the speeches But oh gosh, I did like almost twenty laps of freestyle Ten without the use of my legs too = ARMS PAINNN Hahaha Nvm, good exercise I should swim in the morning actually =/ Then I can get tanner Like I'm "supposed" to be cos I swim so much But I'm so fair Haha unfair! XD
Anyway, PW will be over soon And I'll be real glad Cheers!
♥words from deep within
♥ Thursday, October 18, 2007
After promos is pure bliss for moi! (: Lemme see where I went I just rmb going out a whole lot Hm I dunno what I did the week after!
Went PS quite a few times! With my dear girls Stephy, Steph C, Vinnie, Pau Then I remember going to Central! With my dear clar girls Haha I still have the Venezuela bitter chocolate! Yumm
Then I distinctly remember the 15th! Wheeeee Kbox with Stephy, Pau and Vinnie Hahah From 11 to 2 And it was really cheap! $7 inclusive of everything Lunch, drink and 3 hrs of madness Because it was kbox's anniversary! I'm so glad, haha We spent a lovely time there just singing away It was so short! Time passed with the blink of an eye Cliche I know XD But time always passes so fast When I'm with my greatest friends! We hopped about shoppin' in Marina Square Then Stephy and I bought shirts that were so funny It came in a pair Mine says "Don't blame me, my evil twin did it" Hers says "I'm the evil twin!" Ahhaaa Pau and Vinnie bought shirts too But my severe STM = no recollection of what theirs said =/ I think pau's said something about err...crap? Ehh OHOHOH We ate at Pasta de Waraku! And took a whole lot of pics Love my seafood tomato spaghetti Which costed a bomb, think 20 bucks? Which meant we survived on Donut Factory For dinner =P Ooooh, I remember my chocolate raspberry donut But I had strawberry white and kaya white because it wasn't ready ): Although I did manage to get one home! Oh and before dinner we went esplanade Haha Now I can't rmb why... Although something tells me It was because we wanted to err Get to the toilet? ahahaha -cough-
At Pasta de Waraku! The staff kept laughing at us cam-whoring For some reason Hey we were great entertainment ok? I think it must've been the pics after this Wanna see? XD LOL
HERE
Spasticness XD
Donut factory!
Here's a pic of us at the zooo!
All of us who went! Kah Hwee, Pauline, Steph C, Me, Harry, Stephy, Vinnie, Chong Ping, Raphael, Billy From left to right (:
And no wonder I don't remember much These past few days have been So ultra busy Just rewriting and redoing WR Over and over and over again It got so mindless and tiring You can see people napping during class And looking so frustrated or so deep in concentration Then during midday We all just try relaxing and having a blast Like today! Watching The Shutter, The Ring, The Exorcist etc. Freaky! hahaha But I like (: And it wasn't as scary as I thought it would be I'm very passive towards the theme of horror
Anyway I'm starting to like my class better! But everytime we have outings I'm not free For some reason =/ So suay This sat have band band band... Tiring you know And my tone is gonna be sucky as usual Aieee Not that it wasn't ever, but I think there'll be a whole load of squeaking Maybe I should practice on friday JUST IN CASE XD
All the way for PW my dearest peeps! -cheers-
Edit: Stephy boosted my memory On Wednesday Daddy was still overseas So Mommy told me to get my own dinner So there I went With Stephy and Vinnie To Ajisen Ramen at Bishan! (: Haha, another expensive dinner I feel like such a big spender But I don't have much allowance! So I'm desperately saving up now Before I go totally broke or eat into my savings
I really do have horrifying memory Anyway Tuesday went to watch Lust, Caution With a few bandies! It was hm I dunno what to say Haha, a little boring at the start So I spent eating my snuck in lunch box Filled with rice + gyoza, baby octopus, teriyaki chicken wings Okay, more food I'm much too obsessed with food XD Ehhe Then the show got rather exciting Kind of la, tense So on the whole it was a pretty okay show But ahem, without the sex scenes I think their relationship seemed very shallow Portrayal not convincing There is a need for those artistic expressions! Lol I think even I liked the Pink Panther Movie better At least it was hilarious Don't like Beyonce's acting though Superficial
Food food food reminds me of central again Oh I'm so crappy But we had the Azabu Sabo Ice Cream! Green tea, really refreshing Ex but yummy! And cam-whored along Singapore River -laughs-
Oh I really enjoyed myself so much Even though there's going be serious band pracs AND ocip meetings/ rehearsals/dry runs AND OP preparation But I'm gonna be happy!
♥words from deep within
♥ Sunday, October 14, 2007
I was just thinking of what to blog Then I love news! XD Haha I read it and was stunned This Palestinian guy hid in a SIA flight from KL To SG and survived! He hid in a nose wheel well aka where the front wheel retracts? Gosh, scary They said he could've been crushed by the gears And the air in the well was not pressurized or heated! Meaning he could've died at extreme heights Where there are extreme temperatures! EEK Hahaha Funniest thing? The guy's called Osama -roars with laughter- XD
Anyway I was just contemplating what Doris Lessing The new Nobel prize winner for Literature said "I say fiction is better than telling the truth. Because the point about life is that it's a mess, isn't it? It hasn't got any shape, except for you're born and you die." And I so agree I love fiction Because its better than reality Its both a way to escape reality AND to create more hopes in reality Like stepping into someone else's shoes once in a while And dreaming big dreams Living a life you would never have had Trying something new Without leaving your comfort zone And more! You can write your own story And live it Not like in life Where there are boundaries, limitations Obstacles and much more I wouldn't mind writing a story about my life Except it'd be really boring! Like an autobiography sort But I'd love to write a story about my "reel" life What I'd like to do My aspirations Everything I've wanted to do but couldn't Everything that I can't ever have achieved in real life Wouldn't that be cool? Ahha I love to read and write They're the greatest pleasures in my life Without words, without language Life loses a spark For they speak what you cannot express through actions They help you weave Different shapes and colours Where it never existed
Here's to my life A monologue In greyscale
What is the world coming to? =P
♥words from deep within
♥ Wednesday, October 10, 2007
Dancing bears, Painted wings, Things I almost remember, And a song someone sings Once upon a December.
Someone holds me safe and warm. Horses prance through a silver storm. Figures dancing gracefully Across my memory...
Someone holds me safe and warm. Horses prance through a silver storm. Figures dancing gracefully Across my memory...
Far away, long ago, Glowing dim as an ember, Things my heart Used to know, Things it yearns to remember...
And a song Someone sings Once upon a December
ANASTASIA - once upon a december
My favourite not Disney princess Haha (:
♥words from deep within
♥ Tuesday, October 9, 2007
You may call be abnormal But no one will EVER Understand what an emotional wreck I am I think a whole lot I suppose I'm a psychological mess as well Sometimes I can't tell reality from fantasy Sometimes I can't tell truth from lies Sometimes I can't tell right from wrong Sometimes I can't tell if I'm being myself And sometimes I think I'm losing it I try to be all relaxed and say everything that comes to my mind first Thinking "This will show me, the truest me!" But then when I open my mouth Somehow the words that form Aren't what I expect them to be I look like a very mild, quiet, gentle girl Maybe a tad bored and silly at times But then occasionally I'm this crude, violent person Who does really nonsensical things That might make people hate me And think I'm bitchy and what-not But I don't know Sometimes, I just feel like that isn't me Inside, I'm a recluse Outside, I try to appear like an extrovert Just so that I can brighten people's lives With just a smile An encouragement I want to help any way I can But you don't know how much effort that takes Because... Of things I can't put into words Feelings I'm not supposed to feel Pain I'd rather dispose of Incomparable to physical trauma Suffered by the underprivileged and ill you might say But... I'd rather have my limbs chopped off Physical pain is more bearable To me Ignorant and unfeeling you might say But you don't know how much I want to help
I just don't know how
And besides I wanted to help my classmates and friends with schoolwork Because they supposedly think I'm smart and all that But I'm really not I'm just a daydreaming sleepy girl Who's lazy to the bone And happens To scrape passes through everything And that's NOT being smart Smart is like Aceing everything I don't want to be at the top I'd rather be at the bottom seeking advice
Oh I am a mess I'm contradicting myself I wish I could live life the way I want No school I can go pursue an attachment with a marine facility And all those dreams That I know will never come true Because by the time I get all those qualifications I'd have wasted my youth away Worrying over homework, schoolwork Which don't matter in life anyway
I believe in destiny Because destiny helps you make your choices Your choices all are made for you before you are even born You just don't know it You think you're picking your way of life But actually, it's all laid out for you You can't change destiny But you can change fate I think they're different Fate is an ending that is supposedly irreversible But destiny is a path you take full of choices And you are destined to make a choice No matter what Because your heart and mind tells you to And where does your heart and mind come from? No one knows for sure Because destiny guides them
Ah I'm being crappy Forgive me I should pour all this in some murder story Mandy being tortured and killed Just the way I like it So sadistic >_<
My thoughts are really random today I was just wondering how I can actually disobey Everything my parents say Simply because I have the right of free will But destiny gave me parents Who brought me up to be strictly obedient Allow myself to submit to manipulation And I think perhaps That was what gave way to my silent reclusive nature But I wasn't like that from the start...
Ignore my ranting.
♥words from deep within
♥ Monday, October 8, 2007
Super nice! (: Lin You Jia from Xin Guang Bang!
Anyway haven't had time lately to blog Much has been happening haha But I've been going out so much everyday! And watching videos online So erm Didn't blog XD Hmm If anyone is even interested in my life Haha After promos Twelve twelfies went to Seoul Garden for BUFFET! Whee We ate a whole lot haha Took a few pics of all the food but I'm too lazy to post them And since its late And daddy demands that I go to sleep now Anyway Friday was ZOO outing! Uber fun! Although the entrance ticket price was rather... Um saying it was extravagant is an understatement But it was worth it I guess! Although we didn't get to see little Inuka But the penguin show and elephant show Was all pretty cool And really interesting! (: Saturday was spent with clar girls! Shopping at Central at Clarke Quay Even though quite a large number of shops were still closed And the second floor was FILLED Literally a whole floor For Japanese cuisine And mind you, it was those high-class posh restaurants Which charged two-digit sums per bowl And not on the low end of the two-digit numbers Then we cam-whored at the riverside! >_< Hahaha More pics, but I don't have them Green tea ice-cream! YUM Sunday...what did I do? OHH Slept till two =x And HEY I made up for it by doing PW till 7 With small breaks at regular intervals And watching the rest of my why why love Ahh~ Chuan yi so cute~ But I still like Yalun best of course ;)
Anyway today was a hideously boring day at school Although we did have fun at Stephy's! Watched the Island I wanted to play bridge! But we were all rather wet and tired and bored Hai~ School is a waste of time If not for PW But that's a different case It's like a KILLER subject I wish I didn't have to take Oh I want to go to Hong Kong International School Then transfer to UK or something No silly work like this I mean there'll be projects and presentations But not this stressful...
♥words from deep within
♥ Wednesday, October 3, 2007
One more paper and I can slack man! -does a little jig- Or maybe not But it doesn't matter And me blogging here doesn't mean That I'm confident for maths It just means that I kinda gave up XD Maths is hopeless! Wakakaka Aiks Now doesn't that sound familiar? I realise I just used a lot of doesn'ts! Haha Doesn't the air feel fresh? Doesn't your life feel amazing? Well if it doesn't! Make it do! EHH -stares- Exam stress =x Well I screwed Bio I screwed Chem I screwed Econs So tmr I'd better own Math! Or I gotta study hard after that For promos next year =/ HAHAHA Okay I shall stop with gargantuan-ly ludicruous lameness Argh, I sound like a dinosaur-loving person Haha I don't want exams to end really I mean if they happen not to count towards anything Because then I'd have all these exam breaks Not to study but to slack around So much better than after that Inter-house games Band practices...although I miss them OCIP meetings and preparation PW!!! The scariest thing on earth Rahhh -tries not to think too hard about all that-
